A Young Widow's Reflections on Chronic Illness, Loss, Grief and Faith

CONFESSIONS OF A LIKELY WIDOW
A Young Widow's Reflections on Chronic Illness, Loss, Grief and Faith
Arguing about Arby's
Yesterday, I got a text from my brother-in-law about Arby's. He had just eaten there and thought that maybe G liked Arby's but couldn't...
14 Years
Today marks our 14th anniversary. G isn't here but I still feel married to him in my heart. I wear my rings and cannot imagine taking...
First Father's Day
It's our first Father's Day without G. I woke up feeling numb to this. Yesterday was full of grief and sorrow. A wave of grief hit. So...
6 Months
Today is the 6 month anniversary of G's death. My gosh - how is that possible. I spent the last 4 weeks living at a frantic pace as I...
Eating is Different Now
The days, maybe even weeks, right after G died, I could barely eat. I felt so nauseous. So incredibly sick to my stomach. Grief felt...
Stages of Grief
I'm in a new stage of grief. The first was survival. Survival was all I could hope for and all I could manage. Each day felt like a...
Pit
There's a pit in my stomach tonight. That old familiar achy feeling. A hole burning in my chest. Sometimes grief feels like pain, like...
Memory Box
I was feeling sad tonight and missing G, so P pulled out his "Daddy Memory Box" for us to look at. Watching my son pull out what he has...
Blue
I'm feeling really down tonight. My heart feels heavy. G would call it "feeling blue". 5 months and two days. Yesterday I sobbed when...
5 Month Anniversary
Today is the 5 month anniversary of G's death. I'm sitting at the table facing "his chair", the one he sat in that last morning as we...
Courage
I'm finding that it takes a lot of courage to be a solo parent. No one would ever call me a courageous person. I'm an enneagram 6 after...
Tears
I think I cried my way through April. Easter, all three birthdays, the 4 month anniversary of G's death. My first time having to...
Panic
Late last night I received a text from a friend checking to see if I have enough gas in my car. I had heard some rumblings about gas...
20 Minutes
By 4:45pm today I had left and returned to my house 4 times. It was a non-stop day of parenting and squeezing in school work and other...
The Pictures Stop
For weeks now I've been working on the slideshow for G's memorial service. Taking thousands and thousands of pictures and sorting...
It Takes a Village
One of the phrases I heard seemingly throughout my whole life is that "it takes a village to raise a child". I never wanted it to take a...
Feeling Stronger
I'm feeling stronger today. It might be from getting through April - birthday month in our house. First Easter without G, P's first...
Being with Others
Being with others helps. I need to remember that. It's something I dread a lot of the time. Rarely is there space for a grieving widow...
Happy Birthday to Me
Usually G would wake up before me on my birthday (one of the RARE days he did this) and let me sleep in. Or if he didn't wake up first,...



















