confessionsofalikelywidow
Apr 17, 20211 min read
Time
Time marches on. Today is April 17, which means that in two days it will be 4 months since G died. 4 months! How can that be? It's...
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A Young Widow's Reflections on Chronic Illness, Loss, Grief and Faith

A Young Widow's Reflections on Chronic Illness, Loss, Grief and Faith
Time marches on. Today is April 17, which means that in two days it will be 4 months since G died. 4 months! How can that be? It's...
At first I think it was just wrapping my mind around the reality that G was gone. He died. He DIED. Just comprehending that. He's not...
My grief was intense today. So intense that I almost texted a friend a message saying that it felt like grief in the beginning. I spent...
Today was G's first birthday in Heaven. It is late and I am really tired but I wanted to write down some things about today. I gave P...
Tomorrow is G's birthday. He would be 36. It's his first birthday in Heaven. It's his first birthday that I won't be celebrating since...
We got a fish today. Probably the best decision I've made in a while. It's amazing how much joy "Fishy" has brought to us already. ...
We got home last night and are back surrounded by G's things. It is so comforting - his chair, his books, his slippers... At the same...
I made it. We made it. I feel like there is an ocean of grief under the surface but if you stay busy enough there's no way for it to...
I'm sitting on the bed with candy wrappers next to me having just spent an hour looking up stupid reality TV gossip online. I'm numbing...
My thoughts are muddled today. It's our first Easter without G. We are at my sister's house and so it hasn't felt real - not the way...
There have been new hard things being at my sister's house. Hers is the first family that we've visited that resembles what ours used to...
G was chronically ill for over a decade. Really, starting in 2008 we began dealing with quickly worsening, scary health situations. He...
I'm an introvert. When G was alive I needed some time alone. I woke up in the morning before P and G so that I could have my coffee,...
Too often we think that blessings are a sign of God's love for us. Falling in love, marriage, having babies, being healthy, growing old,...
I'm tired tonight. During the day I often think of things I want to write about. I'm trying to write every day to catalog this journey...
It's weird how exhausting grief is. Emotionally and mentally I am just spent. Add to that not sleeping well, dreaming about G and...
Today I gave G's car to a family friend who is in need of one for her new job. One of the first things, practical things, I thought of...
Hey Sweetie, Gosh do I miss you. I'm sitting here at the table in your chair. The chair you sat in on the morning of the day you would...
I think grief is aging me. I've always looked young for my age. "Good genes" I would say. My maternal side of the family looks younger...
We. It implies so much. Being a part of a unit. Belonging with someone else. Sharing a life. Sharing decisions. Sharing traditions. ...