Remarriage Isn't the Answer

I have to vent for a second. I am already so tired of resources for widows that present remarriage as the solution to being a widow. As if falling in love a second time somehow makes it all okay that your husband died.

Marriage isn't the answer. Jesus is the answer.

I am lonely.

I am afraid.

I feel vulnerable.

I feel unknown.

I feel unseen.

I don't feel like I'm anyone's special person.

I'm afraid I'll be forgotten.

I'm afraid I'll lose my son and be truly alone.

What about the future? Who will care for me when I'm old?

How lonely can a person be and survive?

Getting married won't fix these things. Not really.

Because the truth is that I felt all of them when I was married to G too. Just in a lesser way because he was here to help fill the gap. But he couldn't make me secure. He couldn't make me okay. He couldn't love me enough or pay enough attention to me to make me feel significant. It was never guaranteed that he would be with me until I died.

Jesus was the answer to the holes in my heart and in my life when G was live. And Jesus is the answer to those same things now.

Yes, he will use people. Friends help me feel less lonely. Family helps me feel less lonely. Music helps me feel less lonely. Heck - animals do too! But they don't take it away.

Some widows may get remarried and that's okay. Some widows may not and that's okay too. Remarriage presents a host of challenges. So does single hood.

I need to be pointed to Jesus. The One who has promised that he will never leave or forsake me. The only One who can promise that and I can be 100% sure that it is true.